Day 11: Legs

Various happenings have been happening, but there hasn’t been much doing or done regarding the Project Darwin saga. This is making our mission very difficult as without information there is no investigation. Which is obvious.

More obviousness is this: Any Agent, either independant or otherwise, who so much as mentions Project Darwin, will be discovered and probably given a free backlink. Oh, and track/ping backs do follow.

What’s the name of the game?

Regardless of our frustrating lack of intelligence, the “the” has intercepted a few communications, some from independant “Agents” and just one from DW HQ.

When is all said and done:

The first communication was sent via the Twitter by an agent known only as: whatonline. Also known as Paul Gosnell, this is the communication communicated:

What? Online? Nah!

This is quite heavily encrypted using the double ROT13 encryption method. Once the actual words were decyphered into actual words, it became clear that Agent Whatsonline thinks he knows what Project Darwin is. He doesn’t though, because it’s a secret.

Gosnell also claims that he “can’t wait until it goes live“. This is obviously a red herring as he can and will quite simply have to. Further investigation into Paul suggests he is from Norwich, which is an important fact, especially after reading the next bit that I haven’t written yet. It is not known what WOW means, is or are.

Fernando:

That Twitter thing is becoming a great cause for concern due to the number of twits being twitted regarding Project Darwin and what it might be.

Another independant “Agent” has twitted the following message, even more heavily encrypted using the quadruple ROT13 encrption method:

Has Project Darwin got a beard?

Investigators are currently investigating this Agent and have now finished. After about 2 hours, it appears this guy is none other than one Tom Albrighton from ABC Copywriting in Norwich. This is also an important fact, which is obvious now I’ve written it and if you think about it.

Albrighton asks if Project Darwin is “an excuse to grow an enormous beard“. Surely a rhetorical question, as this images clearly proves some beards:

Three beards, yesterday

Boom Bang-a-Bommerang:

Further investigation into this Bearded Theory has uncovered some startling footage. You can watch it if you like, but the link is quite tenuous:

Knowing Me, Knowing You:

The Link between the above 2 Agents is probably something to do with Norwich, which may or may not be a coincidence. Or not.

It is unclear if either of them knows This Man, or if he has anything to do with anything. He doesn’t have a beard though, which increases suspicion.

Gimme, Gimme, Gimme (A man after Midnight):

A communication from DW HQ was intercepted on the Twitter network as well as those others:

Tear down the Wall!

This is even more heavily encrypted using the incredibly advanced and possibly alien Octuple ROT13 encryption method, but our boffins are just as good at boffing as their boffins, so they’ve boffed the following:

I want to break down the barriers between affiliates, merchants and Affiliate Window.

Based on very little, here is what some bloke imagines Project Darwin to look like:

Good Morning Sunshine!

As you can see, we are all going to be woken very early with what is thought to be the Worlds most effective Alarm Clock.

Greatest Hits Vol. 2:

In order to fully comprehend what might be going on, “the” has thought about what we think.

As noted yesterday, Project Darwin wants “for everyone to be able to add to that resource“. Today Project Darwin wants to “break down barriers“. What will they want tomorrow? Probably nothing, as Pete Tong will have already officially opened the weekend and most people don’t work Saturdays. And only I work on a Sunday.

We’ll have to wait until Monday to find out what else they want.

Posted: July 17th, 2009 under Journal.

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